a shift in the wind . . . and a giveaway

At one time I earned a living working with cloth but it was work and not love although the reason for doing it was love . . . now I’m returning to it, slowly.  I can still make things to sell but it’s ‘work’ and not so much pleasure as satisfying seeing the results.  There’s a shift in the wind though and I think it’s taking me to places I have only sighted, landed lightly and not explored . . . in my mid 60s this is exciting.  Jude Hill‘s recording on Small Journeys is an echo of how I am thinking . . . something new, or master one thing I do now . . . I think I’m about to be blown off on a tangent.

I should be content dabbling in all the crafts that give me some satisfaction but I want something more and I think it’s excellence or perhaps a way of drawing everything in together.  Rather than being, as I was labelled when a child, a ‘Jack of all things, master on none’ I want to master something . . . but I have no idea what.   There is a rant in that ‘Jack . . .” phrase but I’ll save it for another time.

Last weekend was the last big workshop for the raranga/weaving course I attended.   It was a wonderful experience that has left me with stronger hands, new skills and new friends.  Wednesday night is the Christmas Cottage sale at my grandhearts’ school that I’ve prepared for (still preparing for) and then . . . what next?

My question is, how do I bring everything together?  How to I muck around to my heart’s content and tie it up into a package . . . yes, it’s true, I want to be appreciated as an artist and not just a clever creative woman to seems to be able to do pretty much anything but is sometimes overwhelmed by variety that she can’t make a choice and just get started.

I just noticed that this is my 100th post so I will give away one of my kete to someone with a thoughtful response . . . this one I think . . .

Dyed harakeke container with dyed dry flowers and beads. 16 x 19 cms

Dyed harakeke container with dyed dry flowers, silver crimps and beads. 16 x 19 cms

A decision will be made on Sunday (NZ time).  I have already successfully sent one overseas (USA) and there didn’t seem to be any problem with customs as everything has been processed in some way and I’m sure I can package it so it doesn’t get crushed.

19 thoughts on “a shift in the wind . . . and a giveaway

  1. I recognise this description as , “….master of none”, it has galled all my life. I even spent a deliberate year trying to focus on only one thing. I struggled, pouted, raged, and eventually refused to do anything at all. It was a salutary lesson, I require multiple expressions of my creative spirit, and if at times I feel scattered and frustrated, so be it. It usually means there is something itching to be brought into being and the time is not quite right yet. A kind of creative anxt, that I have renamed ‘excitement, anticipation, brooding’, which has helped reduce the fear and self-judgement of my process. I am an all or nothing kind of person, and that means my creative expression is also all or nothing. We are so lucky to have the skills and imagination to try out so many media with our own individual take on life!

    • There is a strong rebel streak in me that does not like being boxed in . . . a very strong streak. I have always had the attitude that is someone else can do it so can I, and with some practise, do it well. As a result I have come to appreciate that being versatile is my strength.

  2. 100 posts! Congratulations! I love that you are searching and know that you will find what is right for you. Unfortunately I have no words of wisdom or thoughtful phrases for you though. I am on the same journey except I am a few steps behind you. What you do is give me inspiration. I would love to make art my life choice like you. I get side tracked and side swiped and just plain wonkered with trying to figure it out and wonder sometimes if it is worth it at my age (looking at 50). Then along you come working on one thing or another, forging ahead, trimming a sisterly path for me to follow. You may not have all the answers yet, but I am confidant that what you need to do will fall exactly the way it should, full of heartfull art and immense satisfaction. All we need to do, I am told, is look inside, as we hold all the answers there. In the meantime, while we are excavating our innards for these elusive directions, I raise my glass and say, “you go Girl!”

  3. Love how you express yourself both artistically and the way you articulate your struggles. You have made a wonderful series of kete – can you move forward with another “series” of something? Sometimes when I have to make choices, I write them down, put them in a bowl, and when I pull one out I immediately feel inside if I was “secretly” hoping I’d pull out one of the other choices…not sure if that is thoughtful enough or helpful, but look forward to seeing what happens next for you 🙂

  4. I do not know if this is a thought filled response, but it is a love filled response….
    I am 52..and have had pictures in my head of cloth and fabrics and these creations…always hanging on the sidelines. Like the extra players on the football team..all hoping someone gets a boo boo and then they can play and do the things they dreamed of….
    I am also the master or jack of all trades…but not because I wanted to, but because I had to….nobody else was going to do it…but here is the catch…I was doing another’s work….the same thing we all do..terrified of being successful at our stuff…because we do not believe we are worth it…but I realize I am…
    So I went to this quilt show and saw this fabulous fabric textile artist…literally took my breath away…
    I have been reading You can heal your life by Louise Hay and E2 and E3…by Pam Grout…and a course in miracles….and my world has turned on a dime….
    I signed up for private lessons/mentoring with Roxanne Lessa…even though I could not figure out how with a job I work 6 days a week…12 hour days…yes you read that right….
    But I knew this..as I have learned my voice in this arena…I can do this for a time…it will afford me a car..which I have never owned except in a marriage…and it gets me these lessons…then it will be a few steps into the pictures in my head…and I will make them..and I will stand back in awe…
    And I will be oh so grateful…because most of this life is about trust of self…and value of self and above all love…nothing tops that…
    And sometimes you need a job you work hard at and do well at..to get to the goal line…and sometimes we need someone else to see our value..when we struggle with that…
    Mine was a bit tarnished from an abusive childhood and marriage and a recent breakup…
    But in prayers and books…and some counsel…I am bringing Mandy forth…and all hope is far from lost..it is restored…
    So when I move forth tomorrow..or even tonight after I lay my head down to rest…I will know I am doing my work…my soul and loving it and loving this life the whole time…
    Go in love….
    And smile from the heart…
    You are worth every second of finding what your hands and heart will make…

  5. Congratulations on 100 posts! I understand the “jack of all things, and master of none.” When I see other artists who do master a specific art/craft, I am in awe of their skills and ability to do something for years (as I am in awe of people who have been married to the same person for 30 or so years). I have that yearning you do, but as much as I want to do that, I know in my heart that I love the process of learning new skills, using new mediums, and constantly exploring those roads I’ve not taken. If you feel you can’t make up your mind, make some pro and con lists. Listen to your heart and follow it without looking down the path too far. And in the end, it’s okay to be a jack of all things. I’ll be starting my 65th year soon and I have no idea where I’m going with my art, but I am so excited about the journey. By the way your ketes are beautiful.

  6. Hi, congrats on 100! I am 63 and understand your desire. It is so cool to have that strong desire and goal. Very happy for you. Keep going!

    • I refer to the place I lived in as a child as being where I lived on my first attempt to grow up . . . I’m getting closerbut I’m not sure what it is so I’m not sure if I’ll recognised myself whan I have..

  7. Wendy, as usual, you have expressed thoughts and feelings that I share (and apparently others share based on the comments.) I’ve been (semi) retired for 2 years now and still cannot focus entirely on one, or even two things. My creative soul is all over the place and as much as I try to tame her, mold her in one direction, she lets me know that is not my path … at this point. I’m satisfied (most of the time) following her direction to whatever makes me happy and satisfied at the moment. Perhaps one day I’ll settle down and focus on one or two artistic forms … just not yet. Congratulations on 100 posts! Whoever gets the kete will be a very fortunate person.

  8. Wendy, like others, I share your experience, although I actually have mastered knitting, to the point that there seem to be no challenges left. And that is when the boredom set in. Not sure what the answer is…

    • Small Journeys is more of an insight into how Jude works . . . an adjunct to the blog. Occasionally there is a video but more often an audio link where she is musing about what she has done or intends to do: SJ focuses on process. An example of a video might be her thinking through where she will place a small piece on a bigger piece and why. She puts a link, like a bread crumb, in her blog most days . . . today it was the little eye below the sketch which I could download and then listen to her talk more about the drawing.

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